The Inimitable Jeeves

Коллекция текстов · humor

Chapter I Jeeves Exerts the Old Cerebellum
“’Morning, Jeeves,” I said. “Good morning, sir,” said Jeeves. He put the good old cup of tea softly on the table by my bed, and I took a re…
Chapter II No Wedding Bells for Bingo
Bingo reported three days later that Rosie M. Banks was the goods and beyond a question the stuff to give the troops. Old Little had jibbed…
Chapter III Aunt Agatha Speaks Her Mind
I suppose in the case of a chappie of really fine fibre and all that sort of thing, a certain amount of gloom and anguish would have follow…
Chapter IV Pearls Mean Tears
I remember—it must have been when I was at school because I don’t go in for that sort of thing very largely nowadays—reading a poem or some…
Chapter V the Pride of the Woosters Is Wounded
If there’s one thing I like, it’s a quiet life. I’m not one of those fellows who get all restless and depressed if things aren’t happening…
Chapter VI the Hero’s Reward
I don’t know if you’ve noticed it, but it’s rummy how nothing in this world ever seems to be absolutely perfect. The drawback to this other…
Chapter VII Introducing Claude and Eustace
The blow fell precisely at one forty-five (summer time). Spenser, Aunt Agatha’s butler, was offering me the fried potatoes at the moment, a…
Chapter VIII Sir Roderick Comes to Lunch
I had met Sir Roderick Glossop before, of course, but only when I was with Honoria; and there is something about Honoria which makes almost…
Chapter IX a Letter of Introduction
You know, the longer I live, the more clearly I see that half the trouble in this bally world is caused by the light-hearted and thoughtles…
Chapter X Startling Dressiness of a Lift-Attendant
The part which old George had written for the chump Cyril took up about two pages of typescript; but it might have been Hamlet, the way tha…
Chapter XI Comrade Bingo
The thing really started in the Park—at the Marble Arch end—where weird birds of every description collect on Sunday afternoons and stand o…
Chapter XII Bingo Has a Bad Goodwood
I had promised to meet young Bingo next day, to tell him what I thought of his infernal Charlotte, and I was mooching slowly up St. James’s…
Chapter XIII the Great Sermon Handicap (1)
After Goodwood’s over, I generally find that I get a bit restless. I’m not much of a lad for the birds and the trees and the great open spa…
Chapter XIII the Great Sermon Handicap (2)
Directly I’d got up I went to the phone, snatched Eustace away from his morning’s work, and instructed him to put a tenner on the Twing fli…
Chapter XIV the Purity of the Turf (1)
After that, life at Twing jogged along pretty peacefully for a bit. Twing is one of those places where there isn’t a frightful lot to do no…
Chapter XIV the Purity of the Turf (2)
I call it an explosion, because that was what it seemed like when it broke loose. One moment a dreamy hush was all over the place, broken o…
Chapter XV the Metropolitan Touch (1)
Nobody is more alive than I am to the fact that young Bingo Little is in many respects a sound old egg. In one way and another he has made…
Chapter XV the Metropolitan Touch (2)
“Betting!” he gargled. “Betting! You don’t mean that they’re betting on this holy, sacred—— Oh, I say, dash it all! Haven’t people any sens…
Chapter XVI the Delayed Exit of Claude and Eustace (1)
The feeling I had when Aunt Agatha trapped me in my lair that morning and spilled the bad news was that my luck had broken at last. As a ru…
Chapter XVI the Delayed Exit of Claude and Eustace (2)
“Of course, in a way I see his point,” said Claude. “I suppose the solution of the problem would be to buy a couple of disguises.” “My dear…
Chapter XVII Bingo and the Little Woman
It must have been a week or so after the departure of Claude and Eustace that I ran into young Bingo Little in the smoking-room of the Seni…
Chapter XVIII All’s Well
I stared at him. That flower in his buttonhole.... That dazed look.... Yes, he had all the symptoms; and yet the thing seemed incredible. T…