Indiscretions of Archie

Коллекция текстов · humor

Chapter I. Distressing Scene
“I say, laddie!” said Archie. “Sir?” replied the desk-clerk alertly. All the employes of the Hotel Cosmopolis were alert. It was one of the…
Chapter II. A Shock for Mr. Brewster
Mr. Daniel Brewster sat in his luxurious suite at the Cosmopolis, smoking one of his admirable cigars and chatting with his old friend, Pro…
Chapter III. Mr. Brewster Delivers Sentence
At about the same moment that Professor Binstead was clicking his tongue in Mr. Brewster’s sitting-room, Archie Moffam sat contemplating hi…
Chapter IV. Work Wanted
It seemed to Archie, as he surveyed his position at the end of the first month of his married life, that all was for the best in the best o…
Chapter V. Strange Experiences of an Artist’s Model
“I say, old thing!” Archie spoke plaintively. Already he was looking back ruefully to the time when he had supposed that an artist’s model…
Chapter VI. The Bomb
Archie bounded silently out into the other room and stood listening tensely. He was not a naturally querulous man, but he did feel at this…
Chapter VII. Mr. Roscoe Sherriff Has an Idea
Archie inserted a fresh cigarette in his long holder and began to smoke a little moodily. It was about a week after his disturbing adventur…
Chapter VIII. A Disturbed Night for Dear Old Squiffy
Peril sharpens the intellect. Archie’s mind as a rule worked in rather a languid and restful sort of way, but now it got going with a rush…
Chapter IX. A Letter from Parker
As the days went by and he settled down at the Hotel Cosmopolis, Archie, looking about him and revising earlier judgments, was inclined to…
Chapter X. Doing Father a Bit of Good
Reggie Van Tuyl approached the table languidly, and sank down into a chair. He was a long youth with a rather subdued and deflated look, as…
Chapter XI. Salvatore Chooses the Wrong Moment
Archie reclaimed the family jewellery from its temporary home next morning; and, having done so, sauntered back to the Cosmopolis. He was s…
Chapter XII. Bright Eyes—And a Fly
The Hermitage (unrivalled scenery, superb cuisine, Daniel Brewster, proprietor) was a picturesque summer hotel in the green heart of the mo…
Chapter XIII. Rallying Round Percy
It amazed Archie through the whole of a long afternoon to reflect how swiftly and unexpectedly the blue and brilliant sky of life can cloud…
Chapter XIV. The Sad Case of Looney Biddle
Archie was a simple soul, and, as is the case with most simple souls, gratitude came easily to him. He appreciated kind treatment. And when…
Chapter XV. Summer Storms (1)
Of course, in a way, the thing was simple. The wheeze was, in a sense, straightforward and uncomplicated. What he wanted to do was to point…
Chapter XV. Summer Storms (2)
It says much for Archie’s pre-occupation that his first thought, as, after a few scattered drops, as though the clouds were submitting samp…
Chapter XVI. Archie Accepts a Situation
Lucille moved her wrist slowly round, the better to examine the new bracelet. “You really are an angel, angel!” she murmured. “Like it?” sa…
Chapter XVII. Brother Bill’s Romance
“Her eyes,” said Bill Brewster, “are like—like—what’s the word I want?” He looked across at Lucille and Archie. Lucille was leaning forward…
Chapter XVIII. The Sausage Chappie
The Personality That Wins cost Archie two dollars in cash and a lot of embarrassment when he asked for it at the store. To buy a treatise o…
Chapter XIX. Reggie Comes to Life (1)
The advantage of having plenty of time on one’s hands is that one has leisure to attend to the affairs of all one’s circle of friends; and…
Chapter XIX. Reggie Comes to Life (2)
“Weakening! You should have seen him looking at her! It was like a small boy flattening his nose against the window of a candy-store.” “Bit…
Chapter XX. The-Sausage-Chappie-Clicks
Rendered restless by relief, Bill Brewster did not linger long at the luncheon-table. Shortly after Reggie van Tuyl had retired, he got up…
Chapter XXI. The Growing Boy
The lobby of the Cosmopolis Hotel was a favourite stamping-ground of Mr. Daniel Brewster, its proprietor. He liked to wander about there, k…
Chapter XXII. Washy Steps into the Hall of Fame
At about nine o’clock next morning, in a suite at the Hotel Cosmopolis, Mrs. Cora Bates McCall, the eminent lecturer on Rational Eating, wa…
Chapter XXIII. Mother’s Knee
Archie Moffam’s connection with that devastatingly popular ballad, “Mother’s Knee,” was one to which he always looked back later with a cer…
Chapter XXIV. The Melting of Mr. Connolly
The main dining-room of the Hotel Cosmopolis is a decorous place. The lighting is artistically dim, and the genuine old tapestries on the w…
Chapter XXV. The Wigmore Venus
The morning was so brilliantly fine; the populace popped to and fro in so active and cheery a manner; and everybody appeared to be so absol…
Chapter XXVI. A Tale of a Grandfather
Archie was not a man who readily allowed himself to become worried, especially about people who were not in his own immediate circle of fri…